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Bill Brown

A complicated man.

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It’s time to select a smattering of the weirdest search requests I’ve received:

<ol>
<li>can dustin hoffman play the piano: Amazingly, I’m the tenth result for this search because of a blog entry about the Grammys. Unfortunately, I don’t think the searcher got the info he or she was looking for.</li>
<li>chief executive when william howard taft was president: umm, maybe William Howard Taft?</li>
<li>is the American Robin of economic importance to man?: I see someone is looking for an unusual business opportunity. Friend, I suggest you look into tiny classified ads instead because I don’t think the American Robin is of any economic importance to man.</li>
<li>truth about AIDS monkey god: This one has got me completely baffled. I’m glad I show up after result 40 in this search, but I’m a little concerned that this searcher thought I was worth clicking on. If you’re hear about your monkey god and you want to know the truth about AIDS, please keep moving. It’s not here.</li>
<li>live pictures of a doctor doing a pap test: This one sickens me all over again. I’m glad that I had absolutely nothing to offer this man or woman.</li>
<li>height colledge english language text: I’m #1! Woohoo! What the hell is this searcher looking for?!</li>
</ol>

This is, as I said, but a smattering of the searches through which people find this site. If you’ve come here via some funny search, welcome! I really hope you find what you’re looking for. If you didn’t, please feel free to email me and I’ll see what I can do.